There is nothing cool about crotch rockets. I believe any term that has the word crotch in it to be derogatory. The correct proper term for these things is “sport bike”. There is no pride in telling people you own one of these things, just embarassment.
Each Thursday night they descend like a bag of Skittles tossed by a giant into the downtown area of Royal Oak. Their bright colored outfits all coinciding with the color of their bikes. They park their bikes 10 to a meter on the street so they can stand around and talk about their chrome and how many CC’s their silly machines get.
There is nothing wrong with the actual idea of a motorcycle. It’s just the type of people that are prone to buying these things. A completely acceptable term for them is douchebag. These are the types of people who make poor life choices like getting tribal tattoos and wearing those really moon boot looking DC shoes.
Really. Just look at these guys. There is nothing cool about dressing up like your vehicle, it is not camoflauge, if anything it just makes you look like an asshole. Especially when you must wear a helmet and a full leather body outfit.
Here are some examples of what I think has influenced crotch rocket fashion:
When you buy that bike with the matching leather jacket and pants, you end up looking like these dudes, but minus the ability to combine your vehicles into a giant space alien fighting robot.
The Rocketeer is also a good example of crotch rocket fashion. At least he killed some Nazis. Everyone hates Nazis.
I stepped in gum today. This is my own personal ultimate bummer. You might be thinking “Hey what if you stepped in dog crap? Isn’t that a hell of a lot worse?”. My answer to that is fuck no. Dog crap my smell a hell of a lot worse, but you can wash that shit out. All the things that make the construction of the waffle sole great, also make chewing gum it’s worst enemy.
Irresponsible gum chewing is a terrible habit. I’m sure you’ve experienced irresponsible chewing before. Like when you sit down at a table in a public area, and there’s a bunch of hard little pieces of gum underneath a table. That shit is disgusting. Throw your chewing gum into a fucking garbage can!
One time, I stepped in chewing gum at the skate park. Why you would spit out gum on a surface where people are skateboarding I’ll never know. So I encountered this gum by first stepping on it and ruining my shoe’s sole, but since I was skateboarding, I didn’t notice. I continued skateboarding and put my gum ruined sole back onto my skateboard and lo and behold, the griptape on my skateboard was ruined. That was probably my worst experience with this horrible substance ever.
So fuck you gum. You’ve ruined at least 5 pairs of my shoes, a skateboard deck, and a pair of pants.
Blogging is one of the many skills I have yet to master. Most of the time, I just feel don’t have anything to write about. I’m just gonna post pictures of people I know I guess.
Oh yeah, the sun provides our planet with the climate needed to form life. It can also potentially give you cancer if you don’t use sunscreen, therefore causing an unpleasant death.
It is also used for Superman to throw shit into.
This dapper fellow is modeling what can be labeled as the ever “so hot right now” all over print hoodie.
All over print seems to be all the rage right now. If you walk into a mall, I guarantee you will see at least one guy with a piece of all over print clothing. There’s probably at least a dozen stores selling these things!
You know when all over print was really hot?
When i was a baby.
